Well wow, after some excruciating days, truth and democracy prevails… Kamala Harris a shining star, Joe Biden a class act to move things in the right direction. Some wonderful speeches that inspired, celebrated diversity, and unity. Decent people. What a concept.
Before there was writing, there was reading. In my earliest memories of kindergarten, I was sitting in the corner on my own reading, while other kids were playing. I couldn’t yet speak English (although born in Montreal, I only spoke Cantonese until I started school). But I loved reading quietly to myself.
Nowadays reading has become a luxury. I have been lucky to be part of a book club with my neighborhood friends – we’ve been meeting monthly for about a decade now. I’ve come to rely on those get togethers as meetings of a sisterhood of course, but also to keep me accountable to my reading challenge. Reading is learning, reading is growth, reading challenges my assumptions and makes me think. And boy oh boy, 2020 has provided a lot of opportunity to think. Unfortunately the pandemic happened, is still happening, and we have not physically met for book club in over 6 months. With work going on overload, my reading has taken a back seat.
But when you set your mind to it, guess what – it is possible! In October I read 5, FIVE books:
(excuse my crappy images, I am writing on my iPad, still trying to figure out WORDPRESS as a platform, and I am the least techy OG blogger that I know).
Each was wonderful in its own way. But each was also very sad, with even the “happiest” offering, opening with the main character’s suicide. I loved “Midnight LIbrary” so much that I tweeted at the author, Matt Haig – and he replied – how cool is that? How cool is he?
The one that is really sticking with me, though, is “Coming up for Air”. Check out my review on Goodreads if you want to know more …
Full disclosure -I watch “The Bachelorette “ . I’m not a regular fan, I tend to skip a season here and there. It’s formulaic, silly, a distraction in these upside down times.
What a concept – here is a girl, given a pick of a couple dozen “bachelors”, they have cocktail parties, go on exotic dates, group and one-on-one “chats” where they get to know each other on a much deeper level, make out a lot, and through elimination over a number of weeks, (who will get a rose, he should get a rose, come’on I can’t believe didn’t get a rose, how could she not choose him?!) they narrow it down to a final two, she makes the excruciating decision and the guy ultimately gives her a honkin’ Diamond ring (which she can hang on to if they stay together at least a year). A normal process, always leads to true love and marriage right?
This season was going to be THE season, the most mature bachelorette ever (at the age of 39) … the guys ranging in age from 29 -39, which in all honesty is not such a bad thing, given the stats (and my 83 year old mother’s estimation, the husband SHOULD be younger than the wife, when you see all the lone widows around her, but I digress…). This was gonna be good.
But guess what? The bachelorette promptly went and fell in love on the first night, having some weird cosmic connection, she could not stop going on and on about him, how she had met her husband, sneaking away to have time with this guy any chance she got. There was drama from the other guys, what the heck was going on, could this really be happening, and on and on. So the season that was supposed to be “mind blowing” – was so disappointing, honestly. I was getting so annoyed with our heroine, gushing over this fellow, falling in love at first sight, rather embarrassed for her. Love isn’t a Harlequin romance (I gave those books up at 14).
Now I wonder though, if I am just being so judgey. An old judgey woman? I am one of the lucky ones, I met my husband when I was young, we’ve been together forever. We can almost finish each other’s sentences, each other’s thoughts. And we watch this show – TOGETHER. We laugh about it, and he tells me he gets a kick out of my reactions and what I chirp out at the TV because I’m such a crackup you know. I don’t know what I’d be like at 39 after a series of broken relationships, still looking for my elusive soulmate.
Why shouldn’t we believe in love, that it can be this quick connection that can last a lifetime? What about you, what’s your story?
An important day. I don’t post about politics but the importance of today makes not posting about THE election, seem remiss. Can’t ignore it, it is impacting our neighbours to the south, ourselves as Canadians, and the world. Most of my work colleagues are American, many of my internet friends are too.
It would be hard for me to work today, even being removed from it somewhat I have a bit of a pit in my stomach. I can’t imagine being so directly impacted.
Four years ago I posted “Mad World” by Tears for Fears. A great song even more prophetic than I could have known. Who knew what the subsequent period would look like? I hope my song selection this time will be decidedly different.
I posted some photos of Halloweens past on FB and IG yesterday, and to find them I went to my old blog. It was nice to scroll through the posts, strolling down memory lane. Back to my younger self, what I was thinking, experiencing, feeling (or what I felt comfortable sharing). Did I really write that? Was that me? A more innocent time for sure.
I want to write again. What am I thinking now? What am I experiencing now? Capturing what will be memories. Or random shit. Likely more of that. NaBloPoMo here we come…
It’s Family Day Weekend, and my Boy is home for Reading week. February school break in second year, a very busy critical year for him – he’s been working so hard and we have really missed him. I’ve settled a little better as a Mom to a university student – having him away from home this year is easier than last – I’ve tried not to message him too often, I know what pressures he is under and figure that when he needs me he will text.
It was arranged that his Dad would pick him up from his girlfriend’s house (after all it was Valentine’s day).. and drive him home. I was uncharacteristically out at our friends’ house for after dinner drinks -where hubby would join me later. My son was happy to drop his Dad off before driving himself home around the corner.
We came home to him crashed out on the couch in the family room, half asleep, 6 feet 1 inch of boy/man sprawl. He groggily greeted me without getting up – mumbled and asked me for a back scratch, And a back massage. And for a head rub. Just like I used to give him when he was a toddler.
I was happy to oblige. And when I took my hand away from his head, he asked,
“Can you please not stop Mom?”
My heart.
I don’t know about you, but I often find myself spitting out ideas for posts, keeping them in draft, and then … keeping them in draft. If I’m to maintain this place as a way to keep track of the lovely moments in my life, I will have to do a better job of actually publishing. Procrastination at its finest.
So this was me in March 2018…
It’s been a little while since I’ve visited this place. Let alone sit down and write … life gets a little in the way. Especially when you’ve been training to be a dance hip hop cardio workout instructor at the ripe old age of 52, aches, pains, bone spurs, runner’s toe (OK now it’s TMI)…notwithstanding. And a little bit of consulting work to round things out.
Outside of those activities, my fulltime (neverending ) job is really being mom. Which is full of its challenges (teenagers!) … but still wonderful moments. Moments when the kids are full of bravado. And others when they just need their mom.
My little boy is no longer so little. In fact he’s a strapping young MAN – at over 6 feet tall, not quite 18, but a workout fiend… he is definitely physically a man. We went to the pediatrician the other day, for a vaccination as he still qualifies to go there. Our pediatirican is a great guy – we’ve been taking our kids to him since my son was 2 days old. My boy is now about twice his doctor’s height… he thinks the doctor is so cute! Amazingly the office was practically empty, so there was time for a checkup on life as well. All 3 kids of the doctor are involved in medicine – the eldest interning now; the middle halfway thru med school, the youngest applying for med school. And now his young patient has applied for universities and obtaining acceptances and offers of scholarships.
Yes, come September my baby boy will be away at school. Not beyond province or the country. But away from home, living in a different place, not in his room upstairs playing video games, doing homework, coming down for snacks. Waiting for me to wade through the clean and dirty clothing intermingled on this bedroom floor to help him find the missing everything.
Flashforward to June 2019
My firstborn not only survived but thrived during his first year away for school. I can’t say it was without its hiccups (or major stresses for me while he dealt with major stresses and adjustments of post-secondary school and life …).
Gotta say though, now that he’s back for the summer, I’m still wading through clean and dirty clothing intermingled with boxes and remnants of residence life.
Some things never change… grrrr….sigh…
So – happy 2019!
It’s been a busy couple of months… since the last post, we had the holidays, the boy got through exams at university (lots of drama there…), he got himself a new girlfriend, my daughter turned 14, and my husband and I spent a lot of December together while he used up vacation days.
Oh and while hubs was here at home, I felt rather slovenly during our morning coffees, watching him on his computer, filling up the coffee cups, me taking our Cody bear out for walks … generally being quite lazy in between getting the holiday cheer going. I would post my updates on IG of course, and spend time surfing (it becomes a black hole of hours on the phone, ipad, my Mac, Facebook, it’s getting ridiculous).
What was dear husband (DH – OMG haven’t used that acronym in a while! ) doing on his computer? Why he was applying for a work visa for a special assignment. Overseas! And yes – this activity was fully and completely endorsed by me!
We’ve talked over the years about living somewhere else, working in another country. The world is a big place. We have both worked for multi-national companies with corporate offices housed in Europe or the US. Throughout our working lives, this has been a blessing, a chance to see more of the world and experience at least a few other cultures. The opportunity to travel for meetings gets you out to see different places -at least once you escape out of the meeting rooms. On the flip side, work travel can be highly overrated especially once you have a family. In fact, our fertility struggles were compounded by our work schedules and the travel associated with them. We actually finally conceived our firstborn while on a well-orchestrated fertility cycle combining a work trip to Montreal for me, and a flight from Europe for my husband to meet me there. The effects aren’t only felt by a young family – it gets harder the older the kids get. I learned this first hand.
The opportunities to work abroad have come to my husband’s colleagues and they have seized them. Although he protested the fact, I knew that he was sometimes regretful of not pursuing possibilities of his own. Often the timing to do something different was not ideal with my career in the picture. However, with this latest gig, the timing seemed perfect and the assignment a great fit with what they were looking for and the expertise he could provide. And I am on part two of my stint at home – no career barrier from me at this point in time.
So with that, he did the paperwork, he booked his trip, got on the plane, and is now overseas for a least a four month stint.
It’s been a month. We haven’t been apart this long since we started dating – oh, that would be approximately 32 years ago. Yikes. This is a major adjustment.
Hence I must blog about it.
A rite of passage for grade 9s in Ontario is “Take Your Kids to Work” day – students starting high school get to spend the day with a parent/ adult to see what the real world of work is like.
My daughter : “If I were to go to work with mom, I would stay in my pyjamas, have a big pot of coffee, pull out my laptop and …”
“Type-y, type-y, type-y” .
Then pour more coffee. Then watch Cityline on TV (blasting through commercials.
Then ‘type-y, type-y, type-y’.
Then walk Cody.
Then ‘type-y, type-y, type-y’.
Snore.
She went to work with her Dad.
At a time 